
Well, it’s good to learn something new every day, right?
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Sitting on the edge of Audri’s bed, Val and Lasper talked about lovemaking. Val said, “So, how do our species, um… do it?” Lasper said, “I haven’t read up on how humans do it, so I’m not sure how different it will be for you. But here’s a diagram and instructions.” Lasper handed her his approxiscan and she looked at the diagrams, and then turned the screen to one side and then another, and then upside down. Lasper said, “I assure you that in the moment it feels far less complicated.” Still looking at the approxiscan with perplexity, Val said, “Was reproductive evolution on your planets designed by Ikea?”
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Having spent most of the week building IKEA brand furniture, this is too funny.
There’s an HFY story where an alien telepath reads a human’s mind. She goes half mad, spends a lot of time screaming about ikea furniture.
The body part names sound like they were.
Haha, dammit, you’re right!
You put this part in this slot… No, wait, you’ll need an adapter for that.
Having learned about the reproductive habits of cats and ducks, I can assure you it’s not that bad, Audri.
Never look up Hyenas then. Great Googly Moogly! Those poor things. Also, I have never ever purchased or assembled Ikea furniture. I have fought a few items my wife has purchased online. (litter box enclosures, small armoire) that were all from china and their drafts men could all stand to stop using software and learn to actually draw mechanical drawings and label properly. Sorry that last bit caused a moment and I may need my frog pills.
Ha! The Ikea reference is too funny. I may not quit giggling any time today. Better than spiders anyway. Lasper is likely to survive it.
Insert tab A into hole B, and gently tighten the retaining bolt.
Put me in mind of B. Kliban’s cartoons “Genitals of the Universe.” But they were all static. Considering the complexities of motion, the attempted proximities of sense organs, and the subtle but necessary and inescapable effects of gravity, I’m not surprised to learn that NASA is already studying the potential for human sex in microgravity or lessened gravity. Even in fiction, this is a field of endeavor with which we have no known familiarity. Just thinking about what it will take to get that familiarity…. I think I’m done here.
You all are cracking me up. 🙂